Authentic Family Living Radio

Listen in to Christine Hiebel's show as we talk about the inspiration for this new site and soon-to-be weekly radio show! Call in guests include Marianne and daughter Danielle Herb and John from the Liberated Parent... beautiful thoughts and community on this inspiring show!

Fertility Holidays and Just Welcoming Spring

My husband and I laugh as we think about Easter. We love watching the boys have so much fun on the treasure hunt, but the truth is there is something strange about the bunny and egg thing.

Let's face it, we all know a bunny delivering eggs is about fertility symbols and fertility happens in the spring with our gardens beginning to take seed and grow.

But bunnies and eggs are so much more literal with such a adult theme, it feels strange to have your children get so excited to gather them filled with toys, money and candy... What are we really telling our children?

We celebrated the Spring Equinox by building and planting a garden at our still somewhat new home. That felt good and the boys were so excited to help create the space. We built two raised beds, 2'x 12' long, with 2' in between to walk and a deer fence around them both. Then we went to a farm to buy 2 yards of "Magic Soil" that is pretty famous around here and filled our beds to the top.

We planted tons of lettuce, kale, beets, spinach and carrots and later will grow cucumbers, watermelon (though the melon may not grow much!)

This was so much fun for all of us and it was beautiful to have the children be excited about the whole process of spring, rebirth and real food.

Some how candy, bunnies and eggs is so far from any reality that makes sense to our family, however we did the treasure hunt (eggs filled with money), made homemade treats and joined a neighbor for another hunt and a beautiful get-together later in the day.

So many times we act out on tradition without really thinking about what it means to us personally. Unless you are excited about the real meaning of bunnies and eggs for your children, isn't it time we let the fertility tradition go (that was sooo Paleolithic times!) and allow spring to shine as we plant our yearly garden joyously with our children?

If Easter means more to you because of your Christian beliefs, how can you celebrate and honor those beliefs without the pagan symbols? Getting closer to what you truly embrace creates an opportunity for sacred times instead of sugar-induced, meaningless commercial events.

It's a journey, but something worth thinking about.

smiles and joy,
Rain

Authentic Living Mom Without Excuses

I wanted to share how my awesome friend turned challenge into an authentic moment!
She was putting on a radio show and the short story was that she forgot.
This is what she posted to the Authentic Family Living site.
She shows her courage, her kindness and how she blazes her authentic trail!

A beautiful lesson for us all.
Thank you Christine!
smiles,
Rain
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How to be authentic in front of 120 people in a half an hour or less!


I did it, I set my intention and excitement, put forth a plan to connect with as many of you as possible~ really connect, voice to voice! And then…..

At 5:05pmEST when my friend said, “I have been looking into homeschooling” it was like I had been hooked up to jumper cables. Seriously, I FELT a shock that pulsated through my stomach… not a nice feeling! I realized I had just blown an event I was totally looking forward to, excited about and really meant something to me- the Authentic Family Living Radio Show.

The shock on my face and the apparent jolt through my body kinda scared my friend. She kept asking, “What? Are you OK?” I could not talk for minutes. I was in shock that I had just totally blown this.


Sure, there were reasons I was absentminded….. from the brain dead mush experience of my three year old fighting sleep for no apparent reason for the last three days… three hours each night! To the broken tooth and dentist issues, to my schedule being TOTALLY changed first thing this morning when my friend said she could not drop my daughter off at dance at 4:30pm…. Not an excuse, just another day in the life of MOM!

When my friend called and said she could not take McKenna to dance this afternoon, I did not even think about the show, I just changed what I was doing and headed out the door... gone without a thought of what else was supposed to happen.

Funny thing is, OK, not so funny today… but the past few days, I had been feeling like I was stretched a little too much. Like something has got to give. Ever feel that way?

I am so sorry the snap happened today at 4:30pm EST, when I had the opportunity to meet and chat with you all. I truly was looking forward to it.


They say there are no accidents- do you believe that? Perhaps there is Divine wisdom and today was just not the day. I do apologize for the time people who showed up lost and for any anxiety people may have felt wondering if they were the one that had the wrong day, time or call in number.

Recently, I interviewed teen advocate, Josh Shipp. His advice to parents was to become vulnerable to their children, let them know you make mistakes and are willing to admit it... to be authentic...

Will you accept my apology and give it another shot!? I would love that!
Christine Hiebel

(You can connect with this awesome Authentic Mom on Authentic Family Living!)

Join Us for a talk about Authentic Family Living!

I would love for you to join us as we discuss a new site, Authentic Family Living, where the most important thing is learning to trust yourself.

If you have had guilt, embarrassment or secrets from your unschooling or homeschooling community because your family doesn't do things like the standards for those labels, please join us as we talk about each family's journey as honest, original and living only in the present moment without labels or apologies!

Click below to join us:
Just Parenting About: Authentic Family Living
or
call in at (646) 595-2418

Today (Tuesday) at 1:30pm PDT/ 3:30pm EDT

Hope you will join us!

The New Family & Parenting Community Site is Here!

If you LOVE to talk about family, mothering, parenting, unschooling, homeschooling, schooling, natural family living, attachment parenting, and more...

Authentic Family Living

is a forum where we can talk over all of these ideas without judgment or worry someone else is going to tell us how to live our own family journey! Our parenting style and our family choices are up to us.

That is why the most importanting thing is learning to trust ourselves.

If you are a mom, dad or a child, come and talk about your life and find out from others how they live. And spread the word if you are inspired to do so!

smiles and joy,
Rain

Authentic Family Living

I admit it, I got caught up in labels. In my quest to explain to other parents how we raise our children, I called ourselves "unschoolers." I didn't start this way. In fact my life has been one of evolving thought and action.

We started as private schoolers. Then we moved and became public schoolers. We started homeschooling in the middle of my son's 2nd grade year and I discovered right away that I was not leaning towards a structured homeschool life. I created a group for Independent Homeschoolers and for the first time, I loved the moms and the kids we were meeting. All of our children and us moms became like family (and still are) and we grew into a beautiful group. (These are the friends in my children's book!) One good friend and I spoke about how we were unschooling as we didn't seem to care about curriculum. It made sense and I have thought of myself as an "unschooler" ever since. We moved again and now my boys both have best friends who are very nice schooled children from our neighborhood.

Until yesterday. I was told by a popular advocate for the unschooling community that I was not, in fact, an "unschooler." Here is why:

My children do not have the choice to not brush their teeth.

I call it a "non-negotiable" in our home. For this word I have chosen and this rule, I have been told I am not who I thought I was. Hmmm....

I know I am definitely not a "radical unschooler." I love to hang out with them and I love to talk philosophy, as they will always welcome a talk about philosophy. I do belong to a radical unschooling community website. It floored me when this unschooling advocate (and good friend) told me this. I literally sat on the floor and didn't know what to think. After all, I am speaking at 2 unschooling conferences. What am I to do?

So I decided to have a conversation with my oldest son. I asked him what he thought and asked him how many non-negotiables do we live by. He told me he thought he was an unschooler and that there were 3.

1. Do your chart in the morning by 11am (this is brush hair, brush teeth, get dressed and make bed. The only non-negotiable is brush teeth however... the other issues are really their choice unless they want to play with their friends... well most days...)
2. Eat most of your dinner (not all) if you want dessert. (since we had cake for breakfast yesterday, I am thinking this isn't a true non-negotiable all day, but I guess for dinner it is mostly true.)
3. Get off of the computer when we ask. (well... again... most days and when they finish their game or whatever else they might be up to...)

I thought about these rules, defined by my son. I asked him how he thought about them. He said he didn't mind them, except for the computer. He wished he could have more freedom with the computer. My son and I had a beautiful talk. We talked about possible ideas to grow, our philosophies and what brings us joy. He is simply amazing and I love the way he processes and thinks!

When I checked in with myself how I felt about these parameters and the one true non-negotiable of brushing teeth, they felt good, though I am thinking to shift and expand the computer parameter.

The label "unschooler," because I have used it as a label for myself in public, has become a bigger deal than I cared about than when I first took the label on. People truly care about this label and defend it, by letting me know when I am leaving the boundaries of it. Labels make it easy to explain to others what you are doing.

The problem with labels is that they begin to build walls, foundations and structures of who you are.

I don't want to ever feel I need to defend my choices to anyone. The choices our family makes are well thought out, talked about with everyone in it and work for our family lifestyle. Most importantly these choices are all consistently EVOLVING. Right now, I am 100% in alignment with where we are.

I realized when my unschooling friend said I wasn't an "unschooler" she was actually setting me FREE from my label structure that was being built!

I ask you, "What labels do you have that have built structures of who you are that if you were truly honest with everyone or even changed your mind, would tumble and fall?"

So who are we? I spoke to a good friend about my thoughts and out of my mouth was Authentic Family Living. She was excited and we are going to start a community of parents and children who are ready to say YES to their own choices. No experts needed, just open family conversations where we practice to trust our own judgment and intuition.

Authentic Families have no rules or parameters about who is in and who is out. You choose! You choose if you want to practice living Authentically. If you are in alignment with your ideals or are evolving towards it, you are Authentic, mistakes and all! Perfection is not part of our reality! Being Human IS! Being honest, evolving and creating joy along the way are the families we are looking for! You can be an Authentic Family whether you school, homeschool, or unschool. Together we can learn ideas from each other and choose what works for us.

Are you ready?

Schooled Friends

It seems so strange as I go along in our unschooling life. My children's best friends right now are schooled since we have lived here for 1 and 1/2 years. They are both very nice boys, and yet I wonder how long that can last.

We moved to our small town because of the large homeschooling population to find out they are mostly involved in school liaison programs. The few unschoolers we know for some reason haven't meshed as well with our boys as the schooled neighbors we live by, who have become my children's best friends.

I am just pondering the "What does that mean?" question in my mind and wondering if I should be pro-active or allow it to be. I tend to be an "Allow it to be" kind of gal in non-conflictual situations such as these.

It snowed again yesterday. This is exciting where we live and it always means snow clothes, sleds, snowball fights, hot cocoa and fun. My oldest came in after a short time, frustrated because his friend wanted to watch TV instead of play outside. He asked me why his friend didn't see how much more fun it would be to play in the snow, than watch TV.

I listened and waited for him to find an answer. We talked about the differences in their lives. How his friend was told what to do for most of the day, 5 days a week, and may have a different view of his weekends than my son. After awhile, my son seemed to come to a resolve, but told me he felt bad for his friend. This has come up before and both of my boys wish their friends could be at home like they are. This is very unlikely to happen.

Unschooling is freedom. Yet freedom isn't as fun when you watch your closest friends on the treadmill of "have tos and shoulds."